Whether it’s the separation from loved ones by being given up for adoption or an actual physical loss due to death, DearJames® addresses each of these forms of emotional and physical loss.
In each circumstance, the gifts of wisdom and insight lie in one’s willingness to embrace the greater lessons contained within each life experience.
Each is an opportunity to expand and transcend any limiting beliefs surrounding loss, once the purity of the lesson and life experience is revealed and realized.
ADVICE I for May
I was adopted from California at the age of two. I have searched very hard for over 5-years for my last biological sibling. I don’t have the money for a private investigator. All of my other siblings are ten plus years older than me.
It would mean a lot to me to find my last biological sibling because I am 21 and that would make her 23 or 24. I have spent countless hours on the internet searching white pages, people searches, Facebook (oddly enough how I found all my other siblings).
All I have is her father’s name, approximate Date of Birth, and the county(s) she was permanently taken from by CPS. I feel like if I found her it would be the last piece of the puzzle.
I have pictures of her and our birth mother when she was very young. My question is; what resources could I find that may help me find her? I feel like I have run out of options that don’t require a ridiculous amount of money that I do not have.
I have cried over it, angry about it, and I just want closure. I am just near hopeless, but I will never give up.
The idea of not being able to place the last remaining piece of a puzzle into place, so as to claim closure and victory, can be both maddening and disheartening. In your pursuit for completion or wholeness, you can inadvertently give away your power, diminishing your capacity to live and lead a healthy, balanced, full, whole and complete life experience. Perhaps by loosening the reins and allowing the breath and space of time to permeate your being, new opportunities will present themselves. Remember, that on a soul level, each of you must be willing and ready to be found and reunited. Be consistent with your pursuit, but not overbearing or detrimental.
To know that you walk in the openness of faith and desire to find her, allows the energies of that intention to permeate the cosmos. Then, when the time is right, you will each find the other. Do not despair or retreat, simply move to allow the Universe to work on your behalf; allowing the time frame which serves both her and yours highest and best. There is a reason you are currently being blocked from finding her, and that needs to be honored and respected.
All good things come in due time. Be patient with yourself while also enjoying and appreciating the beauty of the journey, for the destination can be elusive or elongated, but the journey’s wisdom is constant.
(Additional Sources: http://www.troythelocator.com http://www.yourfamily.com/lost_family.html https://www.tlc.com/tv-shows/long-lost-family/)
ADVICE II for May
I lost my son five years ago next month. He was 22 and tragically taken. The grief is still unbearable at times.
Sometimes I feel like he is around myself and other family members, and then other times not. Maybe I just want to feel him so badly.
My dreams have become nightmares for the most part. Sometimes I feel like I’m missing something, is he here?
Dear ‘Is He Here,’
Never for a moment second-guess or discount the continued presence of your loved ones. These are sacred soul contracts we make with one another, and even in the deepest recesses of our Being, where the loss of a child touches us beyond what we believe to be bearable, there is LIGHT.
Turn your thoughts away from the tragedy, the taking, the nightmares, and instead open yourself slowly to the discussion of the greater or deeper purposes for this inter-personal soul expression/experience.
Without question, there are gifts contained within the rubble and ashes.
What once was, IS, it’s just changed form, and your willingness to open to that ongoing journey is what’s missing or in need of introduction in your life.
Your son is never not with you, however, remember, all of life ebbs and flows, regardless of which side of the veil our energies occupy.
Your son is saying something about the fact that he “misses the long walks and talks and drives you took in silence.” You had your “own way of communicating” between the two of you. It was special, unique, and admired or talked about by others.
He’s saying that he “misses you too,” however, that is no reason or excuse, for each of you to not carry out what you said you would do. He is speaking on a “soul level” at this point.
Meaning, by living and coming to terms with that which you said you would do, be and experience, you honor him and each other, and the very gift you gave to one another.
He is “happy and celebrated” and very much “at peace,” and wants the same for you.” He’s saying something about a penny, a pond, a wishing well, and something about “wishing doesn’t always make it so.”
He keeps showing me a shiny, shiny, new copper penny, and fountains, bodies of water, etc. He’s saying, you’ll know what all of this means, and is his way of demonstrating his presence to you.
I could go on and on here, as he is quite exuberant and filled with a joyous, loving, kind good-natured spirit/energy.
What he wants most for “you” is Peace. What he wants most for the collective YOU, (he and you together) is Oneness – or the reminder that YOU ALREADY ARE ONE.