In this installment, Fearlessly Alone Part 4, part of a 5-part blog series by Trilby Johnson, she shares why you could be feeling lonely. Late joining this series? Catch up from the beginning with Part 1, or from last week’s Part 3!
This is the chapter that nearly wasn’t! If I had of listened to outside sources, I would have left this information out – I was told – it’s too much information and it will confuse people! Really? Because they aren’t confused enough already with the struggle and suffering in life? I was in a dilemma – did I listen to the voice of ‘reason’ or did I go with my ‘inner authority’? Would I play it safe or play it fearlessly?
After much deliberation, I chose to follow my initial intuition and kept the chapter. In my opinion, this content was the crux of the matter, the meat on the bones and what made it possible to connect the dots. I definitely wanted the reader to be in on it – all in one place – and to then draw their own opinion.
The time of playing small is over! To be fearless and empowered comes from information and then using discernment and choosing the better option available in the moment. These were the factors that I wanted to highlight because they were feeding the beliefs and emotions around loneliness. And I for one, was no longer buying into the lies.
As a writer, my ability to share information through words strung together is I consider, a gift and a responsibility; one I take seriously and hold in integrity. For so long, we have been misguided and now, after stumbling through the maze of misleading information and power play for many centuries and lifetimes, frankly I was over it. And I felt called to speak out – and so to write about the patterns that I had observed because they exist.
Perhaps the information in this chapter is nothing new for many and on the surface, it may not appear so. Yet, like the pieces of a puzzle, once they all fit into place, there is a clearer picture and one that may have gotten lost in the detail. If this were not the case, then people would not be struggling with their emotional well-being and health in the way they are. The way I had for so long.
In the previous blog – in the midst of crisis – I spoke about the research that highlighted the link between our emotional stress and current health symptoms. Sometimes when things are laid out in a clearer or different or more ordered way, it helps to make the pattern more visible. While I in no way wanted to diminish the role that personal responsibility holds in our lives, we are definitely participants in a greater social game, which also impacts on our lives.
It was very important to trace the factors that are a part of this greater machine of socialization that we all participate in, that inform so many of our beliefs and behaviours from the moment we arrive in the world.
While the 12 factors discussed – for instance, health, emotions, gender, finances, sexuality, lifestyle – are by no means exhaustive, they come together to form a web of beliefs and behaviour patterns across our daily and individual lives. Consciously and subconsciously, they contribute to how we define and perceive ourselves and fuel the experiences of loneliness and isolation.
* “In a world where you are encouraged to feel separate through reverse psychology tactics, it is not completely your fault if you feel isolated or lonely. The system has been set up to create this dynamic, albeit for the most part subliminally. You do, however, have a say in whether or not this continues to be your reality and to what degree. Often, because you may not have the bigger picture, you fail to connect all the dots to who you truly are.
Propaganda is a form of presenting information in a very subjective way, usually to sway or strengthen the public’s opinion. By keeping people stretched to their limits, running scared and focused on basic survival and individual success, the majority of people are so busy trying to just keep up, that they have little or no time or it takes too much energy for them, to stop the merry-go-round and get off.
As we go through this chapter, you will see and explore the interconnection between events. Seeing the bigger picture is good. However, to change this picture requires breaking the pieces down. Each element needs to be looked at and then reconstructed consciously and responsibly.
By identifying the factors that contribute to mainstream educational, social and cultural structures, you will have the information to make better choices for your life and individual needs.
In this chapter, we look at the factors that influence and impact on loneliness and being alone. The purpose here is to lay a foundation that will link these aspects together in a way that is constructive to your sense of individuality and autonomy. Make your identity your own!” *
I believe that once we understand the nature of the beast, it makes change possible and easier. Ignorance does not lead to bliss nor happier, healthier and successful people. It’s time to shift the paradigm and be the change we want to see in the world. That means seeing the good, the bad and ugly and choosing how we want to show up. This is what being fearlessly alone is about!
In Light and Appreciation
* ©Trilby Johnson 2016 excerpts from FEARLESSLY ALONE
p.s. Have you watched the Fearlessly Alone book trailer yet? I really enjoyed putting it together and I invite you to take a moment to watch and to please leave a comment.