Not too long ago, I was trying to have a conversation with my 16-year-old daughter.
When I tried to offer her some life advise (occupational hazard of being a mother by the way), she ended up walking out of the room saying that she knows what she is doing. She also thought that since she belongs to a different generation than myself, I would not understand what she is going through. Honestly I felt bad, but it also got me thinking that I would react similarly to my mother as she to her mother (I am sure). It is only now with running a business, a household, and trying to raise two kids that I understand a lot of stuff. Things did not make sense at that age like they do now, and my life would have been different had I followed what I know now.
Well, I guess that is what you call experience.
So, today if I were my own momma, what advise would I give to a 16-year-old-me who was ready to finish school, leave home, and step out into the big bad world? I would definitely start with a few don’ts.
Momma really wants you to know,
- Don’t look for approval.
- Don’t feel guilty for things you do/don’t do and that don’t get the desired result.
- Don’t take on other people’s shit.
- Don’t stay in a situation or in a relationship just because you feel there is no other option. There are always choices, it’s just that you have to be ready to get out of your comfort zone when needed.
Above all, stop controlling yourself, your environment, other people’s behaviour, their reactions or outcomes. Too much control and too many conditions stop you from growing and from exploring new possibilities. So, instead, flow with life and allow possibilities beyond your imagination enter your life. If you don’t open yourself to the unknown, you won’t know what you are missing.
But more importantly, you won’t know what wonders life has in store for you.
A year to two here and there does not matter in comparison to your whole lifespan. So, don’t stress or run after something at the cost of your peace and happiness. Things have a way of unfolding. You may not know why a certain thing has happened or not happened, but believe me, it is leading you towards your soul purpose. Things are always connected, just not necessarily in a sequential manner or in a way that makes sense to us immediately.
Another important thing to remember is that there are always choices.
It’s just that with every choice, there is a consequence attached. But, a choice is always there. Never say that you are stuck somewhere because there was no other choice. You just have to be brave enough to live the consequences, which possibly, at the moment, seems to be way out of your comfort zone.
So, dear child, momma wants you to go out and step into this world with trust and faith, and allow yourself to experience all of the miracles and joys that life has to offer.