I was reminding myself of some of the main reasons why women come to me for coaching. One of the top 3 reasons given is their need for clarity.
Clarity around a circumstance they find themselves in, a decision they need to make, clarity around their thinking, clarity regarding their emotions, etc.
When faced with any of the above, what keeps us in a state of brain fog is our thoughts that take up space in our mind. If we could look into our minds, it probably would resemble a cobweb – one thought inter-twined with another, connected to another. Who would feel clear with all of that going on? The more we think about what to do, where to step, what direction to take, the less clear we become.
Why? Because we may start out with a clear way of thinking until our inner critic gets hold of it and creates a bit of self-doubt. To complicate things a bit more, you then contend with all the feelings that come up. If they were feelings of rainbows and smiles, you would be clear to step into action.
If I were coaching you, I would ask you your thinking and the feeling that is connected to it.
Chances are the feeling is less than comforting. Then, I would ask you, what action does that feeling drive you to take? The #1 action response, hands down is – NOTHING.
Then I would ask you, what is the result of your inaction, your stagnation, your standing still in thought and the presumed safety of your indecisiveness?
Lack of Clarity:
Your brain likes you to stay confused. Why? Because it feels safer that way. Most of us who are unclear, feel uncomfortable to step into a choice, a decision.
Here’s what I know, so plan accordingly:
When you make a decision, you won’t feel clear. Most likely you will start second-guessing yourself. Your inner critic will start talking to you. You will doubt your decision.
I also know:
As you take one step forward, one small baby step of action, although uncomfortable, you’ve started to shape your result. And each step leads you into clarity.
– Dr. Joanne Royer