How do you feel when you hear the term self-love?
Perhaps it can often feel like nails on a chalkboard or some unattainable goal. Why is that?
Many of us can relate to the inner critic as one of the loudest voices in our heads, among a cast of colorful characters, always offering its opinion when certainly not asked; “you’re too this,” “you don’t do this enough,” or “you can’t do that.” Sometimes the inner critic feels it has the right to project their commentary out onto others; “look at her I can’t believe she’s wearing that.” “why does he do that,” or “they are too ______.”
So, why choose to incorporate techniques and practices to foster more Self-Love?
These benefits are the results of a 20+ year journey from struggling with self-loathing to a daily practice of trying to love myself unconditionally, and also accepting all the parts of myself (including said self-loathing). This will be a lifelong practice and I’m good with that.
Everyone’s path is different. We often learn the hard way by going through it ourselves, until we are tired of our own dirty diaper. I have experimented with myriad methods of self-help and healing across all disciplines and I believe to my core, the answer to enjoying our time on Earth and radiant health is SELF-LOVE. So, where to begin?
Here are 10 Benefits of Self-Love:
You’ll Have More Energy.
Instead of fighting ourselves all the time, how can we be more of a witness to our thoughts and actions versus playing Judge Judy?
You’ll Have More Support.
Being more vulnerable and admitting our perceived faults, flaws, or asking for what we need dis-arms others so that we can have a squad that truly has our back. Everyone can then be more at ease not having to try to have it all figured out all of the time or fluff each other up so that we feel better. “You look great in that dress,” when no, you really don’t, and it’s okay to hear that because it’s better, to be honest, look fabulous, and feel more comfortable.
You’ll Have More Confidence.
When you are your own cheerleader you are unstoppable! Your aura speaks for itself. People respond to energy and will be attracted to your positivity and can-do attitude.
You’ll Have Healthier Relationships.
Relationships are simply mirrors of ourselves, reflected back to us. How we see and value ourselves are boomeranged right back at us. You can control the narrative. When you are kinder to yourself you’re likely to be kinder to those in your life; you have fewer expectations of others. The people in your life will appreciate it and will want to give that right back to you.
You’ll Have More Clarity and Insight.
When you remember you are a human being designed to experience a gamut of feelings and emotions and not criticize yourself for them all the time and remember there is nothing you can do wrong, you will learn so much more from life. When we cling to judging things as good, bad, right, wrong, greater than, or less we end up missing out on the essence, the juice of life; that it is messy and fun and all of the above. When you are able to see everything as neutral, you can move forward with who you are and why you are here with greater ease.
You’ll Have More Compassion for Yourself and Others.
When you get off your own back, it will be easier to get off other people’s backs.
You’ll Experience more Health and Vitality.
With all of this energy, clarity, and a bigger perspective you will notice that chronic tension in your shoulder or hips dissipate since you are being kinder, more compassionate to yourself and others. You can hear what you need more clearly and give it to yourself or ask for what you need without a problem.
You’ll Take More Risks and Have Bigger Rewards.
By believing in yourself first, you are way more likely to say YES to more things than you normally would when you doubt yourself and throw a constant pity party.
You’ll be Free to Enjoy More of this Life.
Your life will be less predictable, and you will be more than okay with that!
You’ll be able To Truly Love Another.
The great Mama RuPaul often declares, “Honey, if you don’t love yourself then how in the hell you are gonna love somebody else?” Can I get an Amen?
We will push away the love, the compliments, the support until we can give it to ourselves or on the flip-side, it will come with strings attached. We may sabotage real love because we are scared of it and don’t know what it is.
It is our responsibility and privilege to move forward from past hurt and Live Vibrantly moment to moment.
Do you agree that the benefits of self-love are too great to not practice it?
Join me, let’s be examples of unconditional love because it truly does start with us. Write your next chapter, which can be written at any time. Every breath is a fresh start. Let go easier, forgive yourself and others faster; we are all trying to do our best with what we got, and nothing is ever personal because we are all the stars of our own show.
What’s that beautiful voice in your head saying? If you don’t dig it, say “hey thanks but I don’t agree.” Create more thoughts and actions that you do agree with and that will serve you so that we can all be of greater service to the world. Only love is real.