10 Ways Emotional Trauma Enters Life and How to Heal

You may have experienced a physical challenge, upset, or trauma in your life.

Chances are you have. But are you aware of the emotions attached to what happened? Sometimes the emotions we go through are obvious and others are not so obvious.

We recognize the obvious, for example:

• Grief comes with loss.
• Heartbreak comes with a relationship ending.
• Anger comes with betrayal.

We can probably all relate to one of these. You can recollect how you felt but are you aware of the residual effects?

Are you aware that emotions can cause wounds? We push emotions down and walk around saying “I’m okay” to the world. Then one day while driving down the highway you burst into tears and don’t know why. Or one morning, you can’t get yourself out of bed, and for no specific reason, feel depressed or filled with melancholy.

Emotional Trauma Bubbles to the Surface, Often When Least Expected:

Bursting into tears, not wanting to get out of bed, and feeling depressed for no reason are a few ways past emotional trauma shows up.

When ignored, avoided, or shoved down, emotional trauma, like a seed planted deep within, germinates, sprouts, and grows like a vine wrapping around our heart and mind squeezing us from the inside. We can’t see them, but they are growing inside us every day making it harder and harder to carry on.

Emotional traumas affect the decisions we make, unconsciously directing us to make some of today’s not so good ones. Decisions based on what happened in the past that caused us pain is a very dangerous and unhappy way to live. Allowing or not allowing certain people and experiences into our lives based on protecting our hearts or feeding insecurities rather than making sound, love-based decisions creates limitations and also can put us in situations that are not healthy and can be life-threatening.

Here Are 10 Common Ways an Emotional Trauma Could Have Been Created:

1. A Betrayal
2. Being Neglected
3. Having Been Bullied
4. Having Been Discarded
5. Having Been Abandoned
6. Experiencing A Loss
7. Lack of Support (Emotional, Financial, Physical, Mental, etc.)
8. Abuse (Physical, Verbal, Emotional, Mental, etc.)
9. Lack of Unconditional Love or Nurturing
10. Being Shamed

The Impact of Trauma Goes Deep:

Trauma can develop from our relationships with our parents and family, our community and education, to past relationships and the environment. Something as simple as being told “You’re stupid” at 5 years old could cause an emotional trauma carried through your entire life, affecting you in ways you aren’t even aware of.

Emotional traumas cause us to feel insecure, inferior, unworthy, angry, shy, impulsive, unbalanced, co-dependent, disconnected, limited, unstable, depressed, anxious, even suicidal, and the list goes on.

How do you know if an emotional trauma is causing you to remain in negative patterns and experience the same feelings day after day? 

What About the Physical Effects?

Emotional trauma affects everything. The level of self-care and self-love we give ourselves, how well we sleep, our overall health and wellness, eating habits, fitness level, and how well we are physically, mentally, socially, and spiritually can all be affected by emotional traumas.

Many people turn to self-medicating, commonly through drugs or alcohol, isolating themselves, overeating, or the opposite, starving themselves. Some need to stay in constant motion to avoid feelings of anger, avoid having to trust (someone or something) to feel in control, etc. We do this because we don’t feel comfortable in our own skin or feel broken, empty, inadequate, hurt, scared, self-conscious, or insecure, and treating the symptom to mask pain or distract ourselves never resolves the issue.

This is not living your best life. Healing where these feelings come from, uncovering the trauma of the past, addressing it, and using healthy and natural methods to heal and have a better life, are what we need.

We Treat Symptoms Because We See and Feel Them.

Getting to the root is where you change your life. If you wonder why you pick the wrong partner, wake up lacking motivation, lack a sense of _____________ (belonging, stability, direction, trust), experience symptoms similar to PTSD, even claim a phobia, etc., examining an emotional trauma as the root is nothing to be ashamed about.

Healing is Essential to Happiness.

An emotional wound is just as debilitating as a physical one. When you have a gash on your arm, bleeding, and exposed, you take action to protect and heal that wound. Emotional traumas cause emotional wounds and your emotional wound is open and needs attention to heal.

You are worthy of a love-filled life, free from self-imposed limitations, pain, guilt, and unhappiness. You can be confident! You can have the life you dream of, the relationship you desire, the career you dream of.

-The Wellness Universe

*Originally published on March 28, 2019.

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