An Excerpt from Letting Go So You Can Thrive: Letting Go as A Healing Practice.
For more than a decade, I’ve been investigating the idea of “letting go” through my experiences, reflections, and filters, as well as those of my clients, friends, and family.
This journey has led me to develop a five-step process which is a powerful foundation for becoming unstuck, engaged and thriving in your life!!
When I talk about thriving, I think of the dictionary definition.
To thrive is:
- To prosper; be fortunate or successful.
- To grow or develop vigorously; flourish.
I don’t know about you, but I firmly believe that it is the birthright of everyone in this world to thrive.
In this four-part series, you will learn different aspects about attachment and letting go so that you can nurture and heal yourself and you can truly BE all that is possible for you.
When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be.– Lao Tzu
The following is an excerpt from my book, “Letting Go So You Can Thrive.”
Letting go as a Healing Practice:
In preparing to write about the idea of letting go as a healing practice, I reflected upon my personal life journey as well as witnessing and gathering information from my client’s stories and backgrounds. There seems to me to be a direct correlation between the ability of most adult individuals to let go in a positive and healthy way and their attachment experiences in childhood.
What I have witnessed in my own experience and that of many client case-studies, is that to the degree that our natural attachment requirements are met in healthy, highly functioning ways, so is our foundation of security, confidence, and trust in getting our emotional and mental needs met in healthy and sustainable ways from within.
We Are Conditioned to Attach On A Physical, Emotional, and Psychological Way:
When we are born into this life, we are conditioned to attach in physical, emotional and psychological ways in order to have our needs recognized and met. In fact, other than requiring to be fed, kept warm and safe, we are not aware of other needs we potentially could have. We need to attach psychologically and physically so that we are fed, clothed, and nurtured; and we communicate when we need something attended to.
The truth is that we do depend upon having our emotional and mental needs met from external sources; it is the best way for the success of our survival in those developmental years because we are on a big learning curve until we mature into capable beings who can think, be, and do for ourselves.
Where’s the Instruction Manual?
It would be great if our lives came with an instruction book, but they don’t. We need to learn to take responsibility for our life experience, as well as what we wish to create and then go forth and do so. This idea brings me to another point; I firmly believe that from a soul perspective, each one of us chooses not only our parents but what era, circumstance and purpose we intend to experience. As souls before we are born into this physical reality, our connection and interaction happen in a very different way than how we communicate here with words, perceptions (with our five senses), and language.
Back to the idea of choosing our parents; many of you will be shaking your head thinking, “Wow, if I chose, why did I pick this abusive father or this situation where I was abandoned and left to fend for myself?”; or perhaps you have some other form of existential type of questioning spinning around in your mind. The truth is that there is some piece of your soul-psychology that needed and desired to live through the pain or problem that was caused by these choices.
When you look at the development of your life-journey through this type of filter, you may start to understand that those who have abused or caused you pain are those who are the most loving and closely connected to you on a soul level!
OK, I’ve likely made you throw your hands up in dismay again, BUT from a soul-perspective, no Soul wishes to hurt or harm another Soul. The true essence of each of us as a soul is pure unconditional love. When you look at life in this light, it helps shift through some layers of toughness, trauma, and pain.
Would you be willing to start looking at the stress, turmoil, and pain that you may have experienced in your life up to now as a gift; a catalyst for growth and positive change? Above all as a blessing to you? I realize that this can feel uncomfortable, challenging, and perhaps even outlandish; especially if you have experienced significant hardship in your life.
Sometimes, in my experience, it has taken many years for me to get to a place of realization that a painful or traumatic experience WAS a blessing and that I did receive gifts, greater insight, and even enlightenment by coming through the situation or event. Sometimes it is quite clear at the outset why I am going through something and other times it is an education into what I do NOT WISH to experience or create.
In part two of this series, we are going to explore our propensity for connection and attachment to people, things and situations.
Are you ready to make personal and spiritual changes in your life? Consider a one-on-one private session with Moira, or a reading to free yourself from limitations and open yourself up to greater possibilities. You’re invited to open the door.