Do you want to gain more confidence? Do you wish to access that state instantly?
If you answered positively in one of the questions above, then this article is for you. Read on so you can find a simple but effective technique you can use to access your inner source of confidence in the blink of an eye.
The Story and the Miracle:
Since the day I was born, my maternal grandfather was my greatest supporter, mentor, and coach. I don’t know how, and I don’t know why, but oh boy, there was nobody who could change his mind. And it was challenging for someone to believe in me, especially after the doctor saw the symptoms gave my diagnosis of Down’s Syndrome. My parents went along with the diagnosis but no, not my grandfather! He insisted we get a second opinion. And when the second doctor confirmed the first, he asked for a third stating, “this is a healthy child, not just healthy but also capable of great things in life.” Everybody in my family thought he was crazy but went along with him since he was so passionate about this. To everyone’s amazement, the third doctor ordered a few more medical exams, the results of which proved my grandfather right. I was a healthy baby. Ever since my grandfather’s belief was confirmed, no one could ever change his mind about me. I was a miracle and his mission was to help me manifest that miracle in my life.
The Coach and the Granddaughter:
I have to admit though, it was tough. Having someone who believes so intensely in you was overwhelming. Being the granddaughter of a man who thought his sole mission in my upbringing was to coach me to excel at everything wasn’t always an advantage. I was the best student at my school, the best sister to my siblings, the best singer in the church choir, and the best dancer in the dance school. At times, it was quite stressful to be the first and the best at everything. I can’t say that I didn’t take pride in excelling, but I was also a child, I wanted to play, to relax, to be perfectly imperfect. The moment I failed to be the best in something, my eyes would meet my grandfather’s eyes and all I could see was disappointment for just a moment, and then they would light up again to cheer me up and lift my spirits up so I could try again. All in all, I am very grateful to my grandfather because I wouldn’t be the same person without him, his teachings, and his belief in me. Since I mentioned his teachings, here is an example.
The Cowboy Walk:
I was about sixteen years old and while walking by my grandfather’s side he noticed how I walked. He tried to hide his shock and asked if I was in a pain. You see, I was walking like a cowboy, with my toes facing outwards, half twisting my waist, slightly hopping with every step. The funny thing is, I put effort into walking like that! I imitated this walk to be cool at school because that was how my friends walked. And, you’ve guessed right, my friends were mostly boys.
The Unapologetic Walk:
Once I told him why I walked like that, we went straight home where he announced that he would teach me how to walk. He put my grandmother’s heels on and gracefully started walking up and down the house. After he allowed a couple of minutes for my grandmother and me to stop laughing, he asked me to try. “When you are walking,” he said, “Walk as if you are going to take over the world” and continued, “Walk as if you are off to the greatest mission of your life, even if you are just going to the bathroom. Do not apologize for it.” Today, years later I am so grateful I listened, even though I didn’t like having to spend every day after school walking for a whole hour with a bunch of books on my head. I am going to tell you why.
Learning how to walk as if I was off to the greatest mission of my life made every step meaningful and mindful. I felt the ground beneath my feet, and I pushed against it, using it to move forward. This technique along with my posture (walking with my body straight, chest open, relaxed shoulders, jaw parallel to the ground) helped me change my attitude, aka my inner dialogue, from “poor little me” to “I am the queen” and I never leave the house without it. Unapologetically.
What People Say:
I teach this walk in my workshops and people call me a few weeks later to tell me how it worked for them. Some of the things they tell me include, “Ever since I used your technique, people listen when I talk at meetings.” “I found the courage to ask for that raise and I got it.” “My children finally listen to me, and my wife told me I look more handsome than before.” “Everybody turns to look at me every time I enter a room.”
Even if you are not feeling confident, use your posture. Emotion follows motion, and I have found that every time I walk, sit, and stand that way, I can influence people. How valuable would that be for you? Try it and let me know how it goes.
Before I go, here’s a little wisdom nugget that can make the difference in your success:
Surround yourself with people who see greatness in you. Even when you don’t see greatness in yourself at that moment.
When I kept failing with the power walk my grandfather taught me, he kept encouraging me saying, “you can do it, I believe in you.”
Who is this encouraging person in your own life?