Happiness is what everyone looks forward to during the holidays.
However, the time leading up to the holidays can still greatly affect people’s subconscious and how they view family and how they view everything else! What emotions and beliefs do you associate with particular people, events, memories, and situations and experiences? How do you react to these holiday feelings?
Roberto Assagioli, a famous Italian psychiatrist, and pioneer in the fields of humanistic and transpersonal psychology says:
“Thought is an energy, an unseen but real power. Thought lies at the back of everything we do: building our attitudes, our relationships, and our whole way of life. In the world of the mind are born the practical beginnings of everything that eventuates on earth.”
It’s important to discover what thoughts and beliefs you hold in your subconscious. Fear equals stress, conflict, anger, resentment, guilt, jealousy, shame, violence, etc. If you have any of these feelings, you are living in fear. Don’t let fear be the master of your life!
During the holiday season, stressful situations can cause your energy to get stuck.
It restricts the natural flow and becomes toxic. This stuck energy reduces the flow of oxygen in the body and triggers physiological changes that engage your survival mechanisms. This, in turn, creates hormonal and blood sugar deviations that directly affect your adrenal glands and immune system.
So how can you be happy? Understand that fear destroys. It zaps your energy, paralyzes, steals confidence, overwhelms reason, and is addictive. When you react in a fearful way, your fight or flight mechanism kicks into gear, your energy is short-circuited, and stress is the result.
Fear overwhelms reason and steals confidence because it trains the subconscious mind to respond by habit rather than your brain’s intellect. Thus, your fight or flight response is stimulated at inappropriate times and in unsuitable ways.
Dr. Anthena Staik says, “At the root of all addiction is a fear of intimacy, in particular, an intimate knowing of self.”
Fear is addictive because it causes a hormonal secretion that continually stimulates the pleasure area of the brain.
Dr. Staik goes on to say, “Though toxic thoughts paint images of self and others with colors of lack, gloom or failure, subconsciously they are protective strategies that get activated automatically in our defense when something triggers us. Thus, our body associates them with pseudo “feel good” feelings that lower our anxiety, albeit in ineffective, quick-fix ways.”
Fear is a Great Teacher:
Fear can immobilize you, but it’s also a great teacher. When encountering stressful situations, remember there’s a lot to learn from them. Pay attention to stress during the holidays and ask, “What’s being said or done that elicits my fear or anger?” How do I perceive the situation? Is there a different way to see it or respond? Do I truly listen to what the other person is saying or doing or is it old belief patterns that are causing fear to rear its head?
Hearing is different than listening. Listening is being present long enough to observe the situation differently, actually listen to what the other person is saying or sense what s/he might be feeling, hearing a shift in attitude, or sensing a solution arising. Listening allows you to move into modifying or correcting a situation for you and the other person. Your ego-mind might say, “Gosh, he really needs to get a grip.” But, if you come from a little deeper place of compassion, you will genuinely desire to rectify the situation for yourself, the other person, and the issue that separates you. Wherever you place your attention, the energy will be amplified. If you concentrate on listening to anger, resentment, and rage, you will not be able to listen to your Inner Voice of Wisdom.
Practicing positive actions and reactions will lead you to holiday happiness!
– Dr. Maryann