“According to that book,” he stated, “I need to feel…”
“Don’t say it that way,” I responded. “Read the book, hear the words, and then decide what feels right for YOU from there. Don’t just say that you need something because a book says so.”
As I’m writing these words to you, I’m frustrated. Deeply, deeply frustrated.
I’m frustrated as I watch people blindly latch onto “truths” and “wisdom” because someone wrote a book or they just like and respect them. I’m frustrated as I watch “experts” take their own fears and beliefs and project them onto someone else, all in the name of “teaching.” I’m frustrated by the empty, polished “insights” that get recited and recycled to the masses without any awareness of how it may be received.
Please hear me when I say this: You don’t need a guru outside yourself!
You don’t need someone or something to give you the answers. To tell you what’s right and wrong, what you need or don’t. You don’t need a book, a podcast, a wise man, or a religious tradition.
Do these people and frameworks provide opportunities to learn and grow? Yes. Do they provide wisdom and insight and information that’s helpful and soulful and filled with guidance? Absolutely.
Anyone, a mentor, coach, teacher, leader, priest, author, or guru who isn’t teaching you to trust yourself and your intuition first and foremost are doing you an incredible disservice. Period.
I stand firmly rooted in this position. Because there’s no “one size fits all” to building loving relationships, healing from loss, uncovering your passions, cultivating spirituality, building a business, or anything else. There’s just not. This world is made up of far too many beautifully unique individuals having a completely different experience, with a completely different set of beliefs, values, and vision.
I start every single workshop with the same introduction:
“You might be wondering, ‘who is this woman and why should you listen to her,’ and the answer is that you shouldn’t. What I teach is how to trust yourself and your intuition above all else, and while I’ll be giving you tools and resources and frameworks for growth, you should take only what resonates with YOU.”
I believe in this with my whole heart and soul.
Take only what resonates with you.
Learn to discern between what’s aligned and true for you and what’s not. Learn to filter what resonates with your heart and what doesn’t. Learn to absorb only the information that considers where you’re at, who you are, and what you’re working to create.
This doesn’t mean “ignore things that you don’t want to hear because they’re hard or uncomfortable or not something you want to do.”
No, not at all.
It simply means: Trust yourself first. Hone your intuition. Know yourself fully.
And don’t listen to anyone imparting “wisdom” at you that isn’t considering these aspects too.