Stop “Should-ing” All Over Yourself and K.I.S.S. into Action!
Have you ever been paralyzed by overthinking?
As someone who has battled with the demons of anxiety and depression for most of her life, I have the uncanny ability to overthink most anything. There are days that I have trouble deciding what to wear, what to eat, or whether I should take a shower now or later. My brain produces these thoughts of “you ‘should’ do this or that.” Well, who’s to say that taking a shower in the morning or in the evening is the way it must be? The bigger picture being: as long as I keep up my physical hygiene there’s really no right or wrong.
As an integrative nutrition and health coach, I support action that nurtures the person; whether it be in areas of ‘primary food,’ those things that are not food in the traditional sense but feed us as humans (ie. thriving relationships, managing stress, managing finances, having fun, being creative, and anything else that truly nourishes you as a person), or ‘secondary food.’ Secondary food is something that fuels your body, something that is not traditional food (ex. relationships, career, spirituality, movement or fitness). The intake of traditional food is an important secondary component, but I fully believe that one can have a perfect diet yet not be healthy.
Does that sound like you or someone you know?
As a recovering perfectionist, these should statements can make me tense, rigid, and want to compulsively organize my sock drawer 10 times in order to get a sense of control, instead of doing something to further my health coaching business. In most situations, there’s really no right or wrong answer. We are stopping ourselves from greatness because we ‘should all over ourselves.’
While coaching, I get a lot of questions about “should I eat this or that?” “Should I do this exercise or that exercise?” When it comes to health and wellness, we pretty much know what feels right for our own bodies, minds, and overall lives.
Why do we complicate things in our brains, instead of observing and using the intel that our body gives us?
Well, there’s really no right answer because it can look different for each individual based on their experiences, wants, needs, and where they are in their own journey of life. The short answer is because we’re scared of greatness. I love the quote by Marianne Williamson, in her book A Return to Love: Reflections on the Principles of “A Course in Miracles. “Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, ‘Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?’ Actually, who are you not to be?”
Making changes is not easy because they take us out of our comfort zone, and being out of our comfort zone means we’re going to have to deal with not knowing the outcome. It’s not that the action steps to your goals are difficult; it’s our brain that makes up these lies about what we should do when all we really need to do is do something.
I’ve heard the acronym K.I.S.S, as in “keep it simple stupid.” Although I’ll change the last word to “silly,” because to me, it sounds more playful and fun and who couldn’t use more playfulness or fun in their life? More often than not, the simplest answer you can come up with is the one to trust. The success is in taking the next small step.
So, take those should statements and K.I.S.S. them into action!
When you get tripped up, as we all do, reach out to your support system and keep moving. For an added level of accountability, consider working with a health coach.
From my heart to yours, all the best as we move forward together.