In the middle of my twelfth year, I was sitting alone on a patch of hot scraggly grass at a small Catholic school. It was odd that I was alone since I was a ringleader and top noisemaker at recess. While sitting there, I distinctly heard a kind loving voice say: “What you are being taught is not for you.” Huh? You mean the information imparted from school, religion, society and my family? Who was this voice? Was it an angel, my higher self, a protective spirit? I had no idea. I innocently said ok to the voice and myself, jumped up and ran to join the others. Interestingly, I was not afraid or bewildered as this interaction seemed perfectly natural to me. At my young age, I had no idea what to do with this message. I did not tell my mom or friends. I allowed it to be.
A few days later, a stronger light bulb went off. I was walking behind some nuns and overheard them discussing what the parish priest wanted them to teach us. I instantly knew that the information they would teach was required by the church and priest rather than what they deeply believed in their hearts. Aha! Their internal beliefs were not theirs or mine – this information was not intended for me. Good to know.
From that moment of insight, an interest in learning about the mystery of life and the human condition was imprinted on my heart and soul. I did not understand the full ramifications of this moment until much later in life. It took 30 years to understand how this incident changed my inner and outer life. I now know those spoken words have directed me in ways I could not have imagined.
The words and energy of the voice have helped me:
- Investigate my inner soul world and live intuitively
- Appreciate the mystery of life
- Bring awareness to the public around alternatives beliefs in body, mind, and spirit
- Be a spokesperson for what really matters
- Listen to and follow my bodies’ wisdom rather than the dictates of professionals
- Be proud and unafraid of birthing my children way past the normal age
- Using my written and spoken voice to explain less than popular notions
- Always question cultural and societal standards
- Speak my truth with ease (this took some time)
- Live, love and appreciate the wisdom that is me
Since my late teens, I have learned to check with my intuitive guidance to see if something culturally, spiritually or familial is out of cadence with me. I do not take anything written or spoken as the gospel truth. Situations which may be right for some could be off for me. I have relied on my finely honed intuitive sense and a committed inner awareness to keep learning more and more of who I am.
A few instances:
When my husband and I were first married, my grandpa asked if we were going to church. I said, no, we go to the mountains to pray to God – not good enough he said. But, it was good enough for me and still is. I stood by my convictions, hoping he could hear me.
Having children at ages 40 and 45 could present problems to some, but to my husband and to me, it was an opportunity to live more fully. We accepted what the Universe kindly offered us – two of the most fabulous healthy soulful humans. I knew was not a statistic no matter how the kind doctors tried to influence me.
In my fifties, when I broke my elbow, the doctor said that a fracture like mine would result in limited mobility. I walked out of his office, not allowing him to cast my elbow. At home, I healed my elbow to its previous healthy condition. My choice was to not agree with the doctors’ limited belief.
Taking the words of the voice to heart has allowed me to live a life with deeper soul/human consciousness and life-affirming awareness.
I am eternally grateful and continue to listen with awareness when information comes to me.