“You’re too sensitive, that’s your problem!”
If you’re considered to be the sensitive type then you’ve no doubt heard the above phrase before, perhaps many times. The problem with this type of broad statement is that there is no real defining measure of what being too sensitive is or isn’t.
To have an ego is to be too sensitive. The ego is always sniffing out who is trying to attack it, either preparing to defend itself against attack or busy finding ways to attack others to keep itself safe. However, we don’t always recognise when we’re on the attack. Which is probably why we also don’t realise why we’re getting what we deem an overly sensitive response from another.
It’s easy to just assume that being ‘too sensitive’ is associated with stereotypical personality types, such as wishy-washy liberals, empaths, highly sensitive people, introverts, or those with psychic abilities. That is, after all, the general consensus for what being too sensitive looks like. I, however, would like to turn that whole presumption on its head.
We Are All Too Sensitive:
We are all too sensitive. We seek out environments where there are people just like us, so we can feel more comfortable. We use customs, traditions, rituals, rites of passage, and general stereotypes in an effort to feel safe. We label everything and create sub-groups and sub-categories to define ourselves and our world in ever more rigid ways.
Our ego is very fragile. It constantly needs salve and balm. It can shift from overly-confident, to completely insecure in a heartbeat. And even when it’s acting super-confident doesn’t mean it isn’t masking some deeply insecure idea of itself.
The ego can express its sensitivity in endless ways. It can express itself as belligerence, violence, arrogance, power-plays, whining, anxiety attacks, depression, or needing to be the best at everything, to prove how good it is. It can show up as racist beliefs, homophobia, sexism, misogyny, or general insensitivity. It can start wars and bomb cities. It can incite hatred and exploit differences.
You’re Making Me Uncomfortable:
What we really mean when we say someone is too sensitive, is that this sensitive person is feeling their emotions too readily and this makes us uncomfortable. What we’re really saying is, that the ‘too sensitive’ person, needs to learn to control their outbursts or intense emotions.
We cannot always acknowledge the power of those who naturally perceive the ego’s subtle acting out or passive-aggressive behaviours. We’d rather not admit that some people can quite literally, feel behind the masks of those of us pretending to have it all together. That person we have deemed too sensitive ends up carrying our unstable energy, and eventually, expresses it as if it’s their own.
We Are All Connected:
If we were to acknowledge this truth, we could admit that those who feel things deeply or maybe over-compensating for our own unwillingness to feel. They may be taking on way too much on behalf of those of us who aren’t willing to feel our uncomfortable emotions. Life is all smoke and mirrors when we get right down to it.
We are all connected. We all feel each other’s stuff. We all try to push down the stuff that makes us uncomfortable. When we identify ourselves simply as ourselves, we feel disconnected from others.
We fear or resent those who don’t think as we do. We’re constantly seeking reassurance that it’s safe to be who we are. We are all too sensitive. So, let us celebrate those of us who don’t deny our sensitivity and take the burden off them by owning our stuff.
Let’s claim our overly sensitive natures.
Let us also accept how powerful we really are, and how our spirits are always connected. Let us be willing to tell the truth of who we are, simply mirroring for each other’s acting out.
That is if we really want to live in a much more authentic and less sensitive, world.