Welcome to Jim Phillips’ Wednesday Wisdom for February 20th! Each Wednesday, WU World Changer Jim Phillips will share some mid-week wisdom for you to ponder and embrace!
“The only opinion that truly matters is the one I hold of my Self.”
This has been an ongoing theme in my life.
I do truly believe that my opinion of me is the only opinion that matters, and yet, I have too often found myself concerned about what others think regarding what I can or cannot do, or who I am and can become.
Why should I care what others think? To be accepted, to be acknowledged, to be appreciated, to be considered relevant. Yes. Well, no. The answer is actually no.
There is no reason to be held hostage to the opinions of others.
What does someone else know about you that you don’t? How could they possibly know what is best for you? How can they know what is burning inside of you that is trying to be expressed? Who are they to be the determinant of what you do, don’t do, who you are or become?
Yes, I understand that under certain circumstances the opinion of another will determine whether or not you get the job you applied for, or that you get into the school you want to attend, or even get the date you really want.
However, just because someone says you are not right for them, or right under the circumstances, doesn’t determine who you are or what you can do. It just means you weren’t right for that particular situation, or better stated, that the situation wasn’t perfectly suited for you.
It is when we allow the opinion of another to prevent us from continuing our pursuit of something, we truly desire that we subordinate our personal power.
We allow their opinion to wield more power than the opinion we hold of our Self. What is an opinion? It is a view or judgment formed about something, not necessarily based on fact or knowledge. Whoa, whoa, what was that last part, not necessarily based on fact or knowledge? You mean someone’s opinion of me might not be based on fact? And I might be making a decision based on that opinion?
It does seem ridiculous when spelled out that way, doesn’t it? Which is precisely why it is spelled out that way. An opinion is nothing more than a judgment or point of view based on what another person has accepted as true to that moment, whether true or not.
The only person who truly knows what you have experienced, are experiencing, and have a strong desire to experience, is you.
You can receive input from others that comes in the form of their opinion, it can influence the decision you make, however, never allow another’s opinion to be the deciding factor in what you ultimately choose. Make the choice because you know it is true for you.
A process for discerning what is true is to simply ask of your Self, “what is true for me in this situation,” not what you believe is true, but what you know is true. And then experience the feeling of your response. That feeling is how you discern your truth. If the feeling is tight or constrictive, it is not true. If it feels liberating and expansive, it is true.
Subordinating personal responsibility based on the opinions of others undermines a primary reason for being here – exploring, experiencing, and expanding, beyond the perceived limits of personal power.
See you back here this time next week!