I am learning so much as I journey with pancreatic cancer.
It has helped me increase my level of gratitude in so many areas of my life. I am grateful for the good feeling days and even for the sucky days because I know and trust that better days are ahead.
In each moment, I tune in and ask my inner wise one what it is that I need in this moment to flourish. I mentioned in the earlier articles that “flourish” is my word of the year for 2019. It is what I focus upon several times a day.
I am also focusing on trusting in the process of journeying with cancer and not resisting or fighting it.
I see myself as whole, complete and healed. I know in my core that this is my truth. I envision a path, my healing path, which only I can walk. I walk this path, but I am not alone. I am surrounded by so many others here and in the angelic realm who love and assist me along my path. It is my life’s journey; a process of learning, trusting, and surrendering. You can find out more about the angels on my website if you are interested.
Below are some truths that I have discovered or experienced so far in my healing journey with cancer.
My journey with pancreatic cancer has taught me that cancer:
- Is not a punishment but a life-changing gift.
- Has lots of lessons to teach me.
- Has its own timeframe and schedule and is helping me learn to surrender and trust more deeply.
- Is not my fault, nor a result of something I did or failed to do.
- Wants respect.
- Is created by The Divine and under Divine control, direction, and timeframe.
- Is with me for a season, and its lessons will last my entire lifetime.
- Has given me a huge heads up of her presence.
- She is giving me a good start to thrive and flourish despite the diagnosis.
- Has allowed me to be a grateful recipient of every act of love and kindness, prayers and gifts sent to me and my family.
- Has brought me and my beloved immeasurably closer; he is a great caregiver.
- Has increased my awareness of self-care, boundaries, respect, and gratitude.
- Has helped show me how connected we all are. The ripples of love can be felt across the street and across the world
Another lesson I have learned is to relinquish control.
A real-life example of this truth is that I had purchased a beautiful calendar/planning system to map out my year, my business, my engagements, and appointments. I was so thrilled to use this calendar and plan out my days efficiently. When I began my treatments of biweekly chemotherapy, my pretty new calendar was replaced by my oncologist’s calendar which listed all my required blood draws, appointments, and chemotherapy sessions. Receiving this calendar and using it was a real act of relinquishing control. My oncology calendar has become my life plan for the next several months.
Another part of my healing journey is an upcoming surgery, the Whipple procedure.
Here’s a brief description:
The Whipple procedure is a major surgical operation most often performed to remove cancerous tumors off the head of the pancreas. It is also used for the treatment of pancreatic or duodenal trauma, or chronic pancreatitis. Due to the shared blood supply of organs in the proximal gastrointestinal system, surgical removal of the head of the pancreas also necessitates the removal of the duodenum, proximal jejunum, gallbladder, and, occasionally, part of the stomach.– Wikipedia
I am re-framing the word surgery and using the term, Operation Hope.
Surgery is too scary a word for me, and operation feels better in my mind. As you may have read in a prior article, I named my port Esperanza at the angels’ urging. Esperanza is Spanish for Hope. I love that I have so much hope and trust during this journey.
I hope to see you here for my next article next week.