Listening With Your Heart

Have you ever felt like conversations these days are louder than ever, but fewer people are actually listening? Everyone talking. Few listening. Walls going up instead of bridges being built. I see it everywhere—online, on the news, even in families. And here’s the thing: if we want to change the way we communicate with each other, it starts inside. We can’t depolarize a conversation until we depolarize ourselves.

That’s why the Builders Movement caught my attention. Builders’ mission is to build bridges of understanding—to bring people together in safe spaces where even strong differences don’t have to lead to division. That kind of communication doesn’t just happen. It’s a practice. A choice. And it starts with listening differently—not just with your ears, but with your heart.

Exciting Partnership Alert! The Wellness Universe and Builders

We’re thrilled to announce a new partnership between The Wellness Universe and Builders. Together, we’re joining forces to heal trauma, promote empathy, and create meaningful conversations that connect people across differences. 

Our shared goal: empowering individuals to become their best selves and contribute to global peace through understanding and compassion. We invite YOU to be part of this movement! Follow Builders and The Wellness Universe to learn how you can make a difference.

This partnership matters because we desperately need healthier ways to talk—and listen—to one another. Builders is leading the way in depolarizing conversations and creating spaces where dialogue doesn’t have to mean division. Depolarizing a conversation starts with depolarizing ourselves. It begins inside.

Depolarizing Conversations: It Starts With You

I’ve had conversations where I could feel my pulse rise, my gut tighten, and my mind jump to defense mode before the other person even finished speaking. Maybe you’ve been there too. When emotions spike, we stop listening. We start defending. Or attacking. Or shutting down. None of that helps.

One thing I’ve learned: pause first. Ground myself. Notice where I’m holding tension in my body. Breathe into it. Ask myself: Am I here to prove I’m right, or am I here to understand and be understood?  That pause often changes everything.

Get Curious, Not Combative

In a recent conversation, I felt judged. My gut tightened. My body went on alert. Then I chose to step back in observation. I got curious.

I wonder why they have that opinion. What feeling is underneath those words? Where are they coming from?

I put my feelings in neutral and chose not to speak from a wounded place. With an open heart, I maintained my composure and didn’t lash out in anger.

We didn’t resolve the problem in that conversation, but I didn’t make it worse.

Instead of jumping to defend your position, try asking clarifying questions. “Can you help me understand your perspective?” Curiosity opens doors to understanding. Defensiveness slams them shut.

Listen with the Ears of Your Heart

True listening goes beyond waiting for your turn to talk. Builders describe true listening as hearing the humanity beneath the words. 

• Listen for another person’s fears, hopes, and lived experiences. 
• Step back from your assumptions. 
• Listen for the heart of what someone is saying. 
• Remember, we can create a connection even in disagreement. 

In my WU Blog April 2025, I referred to practices that help you respond to challenges with Grounded Presence. Stay grounded and present in your body. Imagine you can breathe through your heart as if you have a nose at the center of your chest. Listen deeply. 

Pause Before Responding

Not long ago, I poured time and energy into a short video. I was proud of my work and shared it with someone whose opinion I valued. I wanted their approval. 

The first thing out of their mouth was criticism. A childhood wound got instantly activated. I wrapped up the conversation and left.

Later, I thought about it. They had a valid point—the video could have sounded less rehearsed and more authentic. But I also chose to not need their approval.

I told my inner child, “You’re not mistaken. Yes, that was a criticism. And you’re OK anyway. It’s OK to not be perfect.” That’s a message I didn’t get as a child.

Sometimes the best contribution to a heated dialogue is silence. A pause. Space to let emotions settle so you can choose words that de-escalate instead of inflame. In my May 2025 WU Blog, Agile Rather Than Fragile, I wrote about calming your nervous system so you can respond from grounded presence. This was one of those moments.

Own Your Impact

And yes, sometimes I mess it up. In the middle of a stressful conversation, I blurted out a judgmental word. In my heart, I knew it wasn’t the best word choice. Too late, I realized my intention was to hurt because I felt unheard. That’s not who I want to be.

I try to own it when I’m off track. “Sorry, I could have said that better.”  It’s a small phrase, but it matters. Owning your impact repairs connection. It builds trust. It models what healthy dialogue looks like, even in messy moments.

Building Bridges

Healthy communication isn’t about avoiding tough topics or pretending to agree. It’s about keeping humanity at the center. It’s choosing compassion over combat, curiosity over control. And it’s remembering that even the most polarized views, at the core, share the human values of love, fairness, safety, and belonging.

Builders and The Wellness Universe believe we can find common ground if we’re willing to listen with open hearts. I believe it too. Imagine what would change in our families, workplaces, and communities if more of us practiced this kind of communication.

The choice is ours. We can keep reacting to old wounds, adding to the noise. Or we can pause, breathe, listen with our hearts, and plant seeds of understanding one conversation at a time.

Imagine the ripple effect if more of us paused, listened with our hearts, asked curious questions, and owned our words.

This is the work of building bridges instead of barriers. It starts with us. And now, thanks to this exciting new partnership, we have more support, more tools, and more community to make it happen.

If you want to be part of a movement that’s transforming dialogue and helping people connect across divides, check out buildersmovement.org.  Follow the Builders and The Wellness Universe partnership as it evolves. Let’s practice listening beyond words—because when we truly hear each other, we make space for healing, understanding, and a better future for us all.

If you’d like support in cultivating grounded presence and heart-led communication, I invite you to explore my classes and resources through The Wellness Universe. 

Because the world doesn’t change when one side wins an argument. It changes when we truly listen to one another—and remember that even across differences, we belong to each other.

Connect with Leah on The Wellness Universe and follow her on LinkedIn and Facebook.

#1 BEST SELLER AVAILABLE NOW!

The Wellness Universe Guide to Complete Self-Care, 25 Tools for Transformation

From spiritual wellness to self-development, inspiring conversations for mind, body, soul to educational professional development workshops, we have over 1000 transformational classes that are free to join! 
Check out our library of classes today.

See how our self-care books are helping thousands of people around the world. Digital and paperback are available now.
Grab your copy today!

Connect to the people that help you live your best life: The Wellness Universe

All information, content, and material are for informational purposes only and are not intended to serve as a substitute for the consultation, diagnosis, and/or medical treatment of a qualified physician or healthcare provider. The information supplied through or on this page, or by any representative or agent of The Wellness Universe, is for informational purposes only and does not constitute medical, legal, or other professional advice. Health-related information provided through this website is not a substitute for medical advice and should not be used to diagnose or treat health problems or to prescribe any medical devices or other remedies. The Wellness Universe reserves the right to remove, edit, move, or close any content item for any reason, including, but not limited to, comments that are in violation of the laws and regulations formed pursuant to the Federal Food, Drug, and Cosmetic Act. None of the posts and articles on The Wellness Universe page may be reprinted without express written permission.

Leah Skurdal

Leah Skurdal guides people to up-level their stress resilience to improve relationships. Leah shares intuitive insights in private Energy Healing to address the roots of disharmony. As an inspirational speaker and published author, Leah offers lively classes, experiential workshops, and keynotes.