When Success Feels Wrong

Why Your “Successful” Business Might Be Built on Borrowed Values

You’re saying yes when you mean no.

Not dramatically. Not obviously. Just… quietly. Consistently. In ways you’ve learned to rationalize.

“It’s not that bad.”
“They’ve been with me from the beginning.”
“I can’t afford to turn this down.”

But somewhere beneath the success metrics, the client wins, the revenue milestones—there’s a voice whispering: Something’s off.

You can’t quite name it. But, boy, do you feel it.

That quiet voice? That’s your values asking for attention.

And ignoring it is costing you more than you realize.

The Three Types of Values Violations

And it doesn’t start with a values crisis. Before it finally hits the fan, it compounds quietly as a values leak.

Small daily compromises that feel manageable in the moment—but compound into exhaustion over time.

Here’s how it shows up:

Type 1: The Slow Leak

These are the “it’s not that bad” justifications. Death by a thousand cuts.

• Saying yes to networking events you hate because “that’s what you’re supposed to do”
• Staying on social media platforms that drain you because “you need to be visible”
• Keeping clients who exhaust you because “they’ve been loyal” and it’s not “smart” to turn away work.
• Your shoulders creep toward your ears on Sunday night. Your stomach tightens when you see certain names in your inbox.

None of these will kill your business. But they will kill your soul. Slowly. Quietly.

Until you look around one day and realize you’ve built something you can’t stand being in.

Type 2: The Big Betrayal

This is the one major decision that’s completely out of integrity.

Taking on a client or partnership that violates your core values—but the money is too good to pass up.

Staying in a role that’s breaking you because walking away feels impossible.

Compromising on something that matters because everyone else thinks you’re being “too idealistic.”

Your body SCREAMS at you. But you override it. Because the rational mind says, “This makes sense.”

Spoiler: Your body is usually right.

Type 3: The Inherited Blueprint

This one’s the most dangerous because it’s in your blindspot.

You’re not violating YOUR values—you’re living SOMEONE ELSE’S values and calling them your own.

You’re following someone else’s definition of success. Building toward a finish line you didn’t choose.

Like the coach chasing a retirement number so she can “finally enjoy life”—while her core value of joy gets violated every single day by the business strategy designed to get her there.

Or the CEO executing brilliantly on industry benchmarks—while his actual value of freedom withers under the weight of expectations he never questioned and took on willingly.

You’re optimizing for metrics that don’t actually matter to you. Industry benchmarks and statistics don’t define your success. The best analyst will tell you that the numbers will paint a picture, but they never tell you the whole story.  

And here’s the worst part. You don’t even realize it until something major breaks.

What Values Violations Actually Cost You

I need you to hear me when I say this: This isn’t about being a “bad person.” This is about how well-intentioned compromises leave you out of integrity with your core.

When your values are out of alignment, here’s what happens:

Decision fatigue multiplies. Every choice becomes a struggle because you have no clear criteria. You’re making decisions from scratch every single time.

Energy drains faster. Even “successful” days leave you depleted. Because you’re not building from overflow—you’re building from obligation. You’re working harder because you’re fighting your natural flow.

Trust erodes—internally and externally. Your team doesn’t know what to expect. Your clients get inconsistent experiences. And you? You stop trusting yourself.

Resentment builds. Toward your clients. Your work. Even your mission. The thing you used to love starts feeling like a prison.

And here’s the kicker: A journey of misery will never deliver a destination of joy.

You can’t sacrifice your way to fulfillment. You can’t compromise your way to success that actually satisfies you.

The CEO Who Stopped Asking Permission

I worked with the CEO of an 8-figure company. Brilliant mind. Heart of gold.

When we got on the call, he was trying to figure out how to convince his board to pay him his overdue, undervalued wages.

Classic values violation. He’d built this massive company, poured everything into it, and wasn’t being fairly recognized for his contribution.

Behind the mask of positivity, I could tell he was tired. Frustrated. Starting to lose his spark. He’d given it his all and had nothing left to give.

We did 45 minutes of values work. Not strategy. Not negotiation tactics. Values.

By the end of that call? He’d completely pivoted.

He wasn’t justifying for his paycheck anymore. He was designing a 7-figure buyout plan so he could exit the company and move on to his next passion project.

Same CEO. Same company. Same board. Completely different question. That’s what happens when your values get clear.

The question wasn’t “How do I get paid what I’m worth HERE?”

The question became “What do I actually WANT—and what’s the strategic path to get there?”

He went from asking permission to claiming ownership.

In 45 minutes.

That CEO pivoted in 45 minutes because he finally asked himself the right questions—the ones that expose what you actually want versus what you think you should want.

If you’re ready to ask yourself those questions, I’ve created a free guide with the 9 questions that helped him (and hundreds of other leaders) uncover their authentic values: The Breakthrough Blueprint.

Your Values Aren’t Personal Preferences—They’re Your Operating System

Here’s what most people don’t understand about values work:

This isn’t “nice to have” personal development. This is business infrastructure.

Companies with strong values clarity see:

• 30% higher employee retention
• 4x more likely to report high performance
• 250% better revenue growth than competitors

Gallup found that teams with clear values show 21% higher profitability and 41% less absenteeism.

Why?

Because when your values are clear, everything else gets easier.

Your values inform your boundaries.
Your boundaries create your policies.
Your policies build your playbooks.
Your playbooks guide your workflows.

Trust comes from clarity and consistency.

Your clients don’t trust you because you’re perfect. They trust you because they know what you stand for—and you deliver on it.

Your team doesn’t trust you because you never make mistakes. They trust you because your decisions are predictable, rooted in values they can count on.

That’s what values alignment creates: Not just internal peace. External trust.

The Three Ways to Honor Your Values

Once you’ve identified where your foundation is cracked, you have three options:

Option 1: Change the Context

Stay in the role or business, but restructure HOW you show up.

Example: Shift from doing all the work yourself to mentoring others to do it.

✅ Pro: Less disruption
⚠️ Con: Requires boundaries (and not everyone will like it)

Option 2: Change the Container

Stay in the industry, but change the company, clients, or environment.

Example: Corporate leader becomes consultant so she can choose aligned clients.

✅ Pro: Keep your expertise, change your environment
⚠️ Con: Requires courage to leave the status quo

Option 3: Change the Game Entirely

Exit the industry or role and explore something completely new.

Example: That CEO’s 7-figure buyout. Or my Wall Street-to-Ascension Academy journey.

✅ Pro: Total alignment possible
⚠️ Con: Biggest leap, but biggest reward

The point isn’t which option you choose. The point is to choose consciously instead of drifting on autopilot.

The Values Integrity Audit (Do This Now)

Don’t just read this. Do it.

Step 1: Identify Your TRUE Values (not the aspirational ones)

Ask yourself:

• When I’m stressed, what do I protect first?
• When I feel most alive in my work, what value is being honored?
• When I feel frustrated or drained, what value is being violated?

Write down 3-5 core values. Not 10. Your TOP 3-5. The ones that fundamentally shape who you are.

Step 2: The Integrity Scan

For each value, ask:

1. On a scale of 1-10, how aligned is my current business with this value?
2. Where specifically am I violating this value? (Get specific. Name it.)
3. What’s this violation actually costing me? (Real life. Not abstract terms.)

Step 3: Choose ONE Action

Look at your lowest-scoring value.

What’s ONE structure you could put in place THIS WEEK to honor it?

Not someday. Not when things calm down. This week.

Your Empowered Choice

You built your business to create freedom, impact, and prosperity.

Not to become a prisoner of your own success.

When you align your business with your actual values—not borrowed ones, not aspirational ones, but the ones that make you feel alive—everything shifts.

Your decisions get faster. Your energy returns. Your impact deepens.

And here’s the beautiful part: You don’t have to blow everything up to do this.

You just have to get honest about where the cracks are.

That’s what we do in Your Soul-Led Business Development Program. Value Clarity is the first of four foundational pillars we build—because without a solid foundation, even the most beautiful structure eventually collapses.

You already know something’s off. The question is: how much longer will you wait? Every week you delay is another week of borrowed values compounding. Every month you rationalize is energy you’ll never get back.

The power to change this is yours—but only if you use it.

Your move.

Connect with Anik on The Wellness Universe and follow her on Facebook and YouTube.

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Anik Malenfant

Anik guides soul-led professionals by merging cutting-edge science, spirituality, and proven strategies to fuel the growth they crave. Through inner work, intuition, and inspired action, she empowers clients to expand into deeper alignment and fulfillment—always without compromise.