When I first met you, I admired how you looked at life and figured out how to follow your dream even though it was hard, even though you had fears, even though there were challenges all around you. After reading your book and watching your launch, I am in-spired. Inspired by your love and compassion for yourself. Watching you take care of your dream has reminded me to take care of mine. I can take care of my health and even the health of others, but I forgot my dream and it drifted away. You brought light back to that. You brought energy to it. You and your journey, your message; past, health challenges, stress, and pressure and you are always moving forward even if it’s not even a step but just a lean-in. I will always carry your voice in my head because it reminds me to never give up.– Heather R.
This is the message I woke up to today in my inbox. I lost it.
You see, when you literally create something, whether it be a book, a painting, a movie, song, poem, etc., it’s a very vulnerable thing to do. You leave yourself out there and open to criticism. And on top of that, writing a book that is so personal, so honest and so raw takes it to an even higher level. So, when I recently published my book, I wasn’t thinking about it as a dream accomplished. I was focused on how my journey could serve others. How my challenges could help heal.
When I received this message, what dawned on me is that it’s not just about the big moments in our lives, (i.e. book launch, starting a new business, engagement, etc.) where people take notice; it’s in everything you do. How you show up to life. How you treat others. How you keep going no matter how hard something might be. People take note of who you are and not so much what you achieve in the world.
In my new International Best-Selling book, “Love Yourself Happy,” I speak about how I dealt with perfectionism throughout my life and how it has often stopped me from truly appreciating all that I have right now. And truthfully, who I really am. It seemed to me that there was always more to do. More to achieve. More to surpass. So being able to recognize what she saw in me was almost impossible because I was too busy working on what I thought I had to do in order to feel I had value and worth. That often showed up as goals achieved, how much attention I received, and my financial status.
I would like to share with you an excerpt from the chapter, “Stop Trying to Be Perfect,” to explain more.
IT DOES NOT EXIST IN ANYONE.
Yes, those caps are on purpose. I am yelling. Not at you; at the entire world. Just STOP.
If you set these ridiculous expectations of perfection, you will always be disappointed in yourself. It’s too damn exhausting to feel that way all the time and to have to crawl your-self out of that self-pity hole time and time again. At some point, you can catch on and realize that whatever bar you keep setting for yourself, it’s never high enough. Stop the crazy chase! (And if it’s not perfectionism for you, insert whatever else you keep chasing.)
While I would love for you to be so crazy inspired by every ‘perfect’ word I write and that you take action to completely transform your life, the truth is that not only is that impossible, it means that anything else I do in life has to exceed that perfection I’ve already attained. And it would absolutely give me a coronary to even begin to think about taking that on. So, for now, I’ll just show up doing my best and in the times that it’s not so great, I’ll love myself anyway.
On the road to self-love, do the best you can. Show up. Be kind. Love hard. Be honest. Have fun. And when you screw up, apologize.
There is no perfect person out there and once you give up on trying to be that, you’ll come to see that who you are is good enough.
Just keep being more of you. More of your perfectly, imperfect self.
I hope that whatever you choose to do, that you are gentle and kind and loving with yourself. That you appreciate all of you right now without any concern over what you do or don’t have. Your life is valuable, you are valuable, and messages like the one I received this morning remind me to just keep being me.
Would you like to own a copy of Love Yourself Happy? Grab yours HERE! Digital reader? You can get your eBook HERE!
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I am a motivational speaker, author, life inspirer, and vlogger. I am the Co-Founder of The Wellness Universe and am presently working on several other life-changing projects with our company, Soul Ventures, that will bring forth positive change on this planet. Besides talking, I am equally passionate about travel. My idea of the perfect life is spent on planes, trains, and automobiles seeing the world. I have pep talks with myself daily. One of my biggest beliefs is that we all have a gift that is uniquely ours and it has been given to us so we can share it. It is rare that you will find me without a smile and it is rare that I’m not trying to make you smile. I presently live in Los Angeles with my boyfriend and our cat, Hershey. I would say I have a pretty simple but extraordinary life!