We’ve all felt rejection, but I want to challenge you in a new way to help you heal and move on, rather than suffer or keep it pent up.
As you can imagine, in my work I come across a swathe of negative emotions; healing rejection, loss, guilt, regret, and feelings of inadequacy come up a lot! This sounds like a bad thing, but every person that comes to me and shares their authentic feelings, it is one more person I can help move forward towards healing and empowerment.
You don’t need to dig deep
I bet if you take a moment, you can easily stir up an experience where you fear rejection or felt rejected.
In fact, fear of rejection is one of the top reasons we hold ourselves back from stepping out into what we really want. You might think to yourself, “I don’t care what people think,” and on a conscious level that might be true. But, your subconscious, the mind who governs your deepest belief patterns, feelings, and behaviours, categorically does care.
Your subconscious is drawing from its own hierarchy of needs. It is solely focused on avoiding risk and pain, actual or merely perceived, no matter how unlikely and often at all costs.
I’ve witnessed myself and so many others talk themselves out of opportunities because of the powerful undercurrent that these foundational programs subtly wield over our conscious selves. Moving from excitement into self-doubt, feeling “guided” to change their minds, or flat-out sabotaging themselves out of a good thing. That’s where discernment between your intuition and instinct is essential.
I have seen some powerful healings and transformations unfold when we can overcome this fear of rejection. So, how do we move forward, past these feelings of unworthiness, and lack of self-acceptance?
I have an unlikely solution that rose from the very depths of my being which has been instrumental in shifting the perception of this wound altogether.
Make peace with incompatibility.
Could it be? Actually, accepting rejection? Are you nuts?!
I questioned it at first too but then I explored it further.
What if we made peace with the undeniable truth that there will always be something or someone that will not be in total synchrony with our lives at that time. Instead of our current paradigm of rejection, unworthiness, disappointment, and inadequacy, what if we adjusted our perception to interpret it simply as incompatibility instead of lack or rejection? What a concept!
Imagine the future pains avoided completely by recognizing the loss, change, or “rejection” as a simple statement of incompatibility. When I sat with this realization, it totally changed how I saw and felt about rejection.
Do we blame Samsung chargers for being incompatible with iPhones? Do we see one as unworthy or not good enough because they don’t fit?
Of course not!
So, why do we blame ourselves or others when relationships evolve or devolve? Why do we feel disappointed when our assumptions aren’t satisfied? Or feel guilty for saying NO?
When we move into a space of non-judgmental acceptance with incompatibility, we are releasing ourselves from the self-imposed oppression of the fear of rejection; we are making peace with our past pains, and we are clearing the road to deep self-acceptance.
More powerfully, we are giving ourselves permission to be authentic, and for others to be empowered to do the same as well.
This week, adjust your vision from rejection to incompatibility and see how you feel that might be different than before.
Explore what wounds you are able to heal with this simple shift. And identify how this small change in your perception transforms how you might react differently than in past situations.
Recognizing the undercurrents of your subconscious patterns that are holding you back will save you a huge amount of heartache. Addressing these conflicting patterns will help you make positive strides forward and do a world of good for your self-confidence.
Minimize your pain and maximize your forward momentum – get to it!
Your humble guide,
Anik J. Malenfant
Connect with Anik today!
All information, content, and material are for informational purposes only and are not intended to serve as a substitute for the consultation, diagnosis, and/or medical treatment of a qualified physician or healthcare provider. The information supplied through or on this page, or by any representative or agent of The Wellness Universe, is for informational purposes only and does not constitute medical, legal, or other professional advice. Health-related information provided through this website is not a substitute for medical advice and should not be used to diagnose or treat health problems or to prescribe any medical devices or other remedies. The Wellness Universe reserves the right to remove, edit, move or close any content item for any reason, including, but not limited to, comments that are in violation of the laws and regulations formed pursuant to the Federal Food, Drug, and Cosmetic Act. None of the posts and articles on The Wellness Universe page may be reprinted without express written permission.
Self-development, self-care, and inspirational classes and sessions by Wellness Universe World Changer instructors who support your total well-being.
The Wellness Universe is here to serve your best well-being. If you are experiencing anxiety, grief, overwhelm, guilt, anger, or seeking ways to cope and get help for stress, relationships, parenting, or any other issue during this challenging time, we have wonderful resources for you to connect with. Our WU Best Help members are offering reduced rates, sliding scale payment options, and even pro-bono sessions.
WU Best Help