How Resisting Your Emotions Limits Your Happiness

How Resisting Your Emotions Limits Your Happiness by Ilene Dillon #TheWellnessUniverse #WUVIP #WUWorldChanger #Resisting

Welcome to the 26 days of Happiness series! Today is day 3! Please meet featured author, Ilene Dillon, from the soon to be released book: The Wellness Universe Guide to Complete Self-Care, 25 Tools for Happiness, which will be released on February 11th!

YOU are an energy being! Everything in creation is energy, even though it may appear solid to us (like a rock). When we talk about happiness, this fact, that you and I and all of us are Energy Beings, is really important.

There are some things we need to review about “energy.”


  • Can neither be created nor destroyed
  • NEEDS to move
  • Piles up, creating pressure, when it does not move
  • Constantly seeks to overcome barriers to its movement
  • Can become “hot” as resistance to its movement holds it back
  • Can create devastation when released after it has stayed piled up for a while
  • Can be channeled, put to work, and be benefitted from when allowed to move
  • Is not “good,” “bad,” “positive,” or “negative.” It just “is.”

And some things to review about “emotions.”


  • Are energy, “e-motions,” energy in motion
  • Can neither be created nor destroyed
  • NEED to move
  • Pile up, creating pressure, when not allowed to move
  • Constantly seeks to overcome blockages to their movement
  • Can become “hot” as individuals hold emotions back, resisting their movement
  • Can, depending on the emotion, create devastation when released after blocking
  • Can be channeled, put to work, and benefitted from when allowed to move
  • Are not “good,” “bad,” “positive,” or “negative.” They just “are.”

Putting these things together, it’s clear that emotions, which are energy, can cause us problems when we hold onto them. As we hold onto them, over time, they are constantly seeking ways to escape the blockades we’ve set up. They seek out the weakest points in our bodies and psyches and attempt to move there, frequently stimulating the development of mental and physical illnesses. Such illnesses are one-way emotions that register the “hot” that results from blocking their movement. If we’ve held onto them for a long while, they can cause us even more problems when we release them. When they, at last, erupt from us, we tend to label them as “bad,” referring to them as “negative.” In truth, they are not “bad” or “negative.” They develop their negative aspects because we hold onto them.

We humans find unhappiness in “problems.”

A majority of the “problems” we experience result from us not allowing the energy of emotions to move!

It is clear then, that a great deal of unhappiness occurs because we block the movement of the emotions, we feel inside us.

It also suggests to us that happiness can occur when we allow emotions freedom of movement.

Emotions are designed to rise up whenever we have experiences, each one bringing a message to us about how to understand and resolve the “lesson” that the experience has brought us. The design is then for us to hear their message, heed it, and use it to resolve the “puzzle” (problem) of the experience, followed by releasing the energy of that emotion, letting it go.

If you really want to be happy, keep the emotions you experience moving!

The sooner we resolve the lesson of our experiences, the more easily the associated emotions can flow through and move on. The more lessons we resolve, the easier the resolution of problems becomes. The more we allow this process to work as it’s designed, the less “negative” we generate, the less intense the lessons, and the happier we become.

How do we do this? Use these steps:

  1. Accept the paradigm that our earth is a Giant School, to which we have all come in order to learn and grow. Lessons continue throughout our time on earth.
  2. Realize that once a “lesson” (something you need to learn, tailored for you!) arises, it does not go away. “Resistance” builds the longer we take to address and learn our lessons. (It’s part of PTSD, which results when we either don’t have or take the time to complete lessons from particularly powerful experiences and allow them to move on. PTSD results from blocked and piled-up emotions, unable to move, their energy still trapped inside of us.)
  3. Demonstrate to yourself that the instant we learn a lesson, it is completely finished! We’re free to move on, and those accompanying emotions are free to move on.
  4. When you have an experience, stop and ask yourself: “What could I possibly be trying to teach myself by having this experience?” KEEP ASKING until you get answers. They will come.
  5. Feel, experience, and look at the emotions that accompany that experience. Find out the message of emotions (there are 12 listed in my book, Emotions in Motion: Mastering Life’s Built-in Navigation System,
  6. As you get a clearer idea of your lesson, apply the message of the accompanying emotions. For example, if you feel lonely as part of your experience of spending Christmas alone, allow yourself to feel the loneliness. Discover that the message of loneliness is that you have more energy going out than coming back in. Develop some things you can do to bring energy into yourself. Best things to do for loneliness are things for which you have a talent. Sing, cook, play a sport, hike, listen to music, work out, or read something uplifting. Do those things. Allow yourself to feel loneliness disappearing.
  7. When you have identified and learned the lesson, let the accompanying emotions go (they will likely very easily move on their way by themselves, but you might want to forgive someone else, or yourself, for the experience).
  8. Be grateful for the lesson, the emotional messages, your ability to work with emotions, the learning of the lesson, your understanding, the release, whoever brought this lesson to you (even if you don’t like them for it!), and for the fact that the lesson is learned, the emotions released, and your life trajectory is re-set.
  9. Be Happy!
  10. Move on.

Allow your natural happiness and joy to rise to the surface. Unblocking emotional energy creates a vacuum into which happiness pours.

Enjoy! Be Happy!

– Ilene

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